She’s a successful graphic designer and is doing a lot of graphic promotion work for alternative fashion labels and performers through her start up. She makes good money doing this. She’s really good at it. Some of the work she likes, other work she does for the money. She hasn’t come across avatar or business strategies yet. She’s well networked and word of mouth has made her the go-to designer gal. Sometimes she passes on work to other designers who work for her.
She doesn’t REALLY want to be designing though. She wants to be a singer, poet, speaker and host of women’s work business (using her voice in the spotlight being seen) - she wants to talk about women being powerful, about confidence to be your true self. In London she sees a lot of people trying to conform to an “alternative” image, but it feels insincere. She wants REAL authenticity, rather than performed authenticity and she’s a little bit sick of the show she sees in people who follow spiritual and cultural indie trends, rather than finding their true self. She believes she’d do a better job than most - but she isn’t.
She’s 27. She’s mixed race, (White British Mum, West African Dad - her Dad passed away when she was 16). She’s much closer to her mum, her dad was present in her life though. She now has an unstable relationship with her mother. Unconsolidated emotional issues from the passing of her father. She’s from London, very western in her ways, but loves all things alternative, divinity, African, culture, spiritual and ritual. She’s been exposed to the “world music” dance and music scene growing up - she’s still plugged into it but it’s not quite her thing. A childhood reference. She wants to spend more time traveling. She can’t quite piece together how or where though.
She has an older brother who encourages her business, he always did operating job somewhere, she's not quite sure of the details, and now he’s in the early days of running a landscaping business. He quit his job so there’s a bit of tension in the family around whether or not he’ll succeed (this makes it harder for her to trust she can pursue her own dreams). She also has a younger sister who is studying dance at uni.
When her sister was a baby she couldn’t say “Leya” so “Eya” became her name and it stuck. She now goes by either. She’s a middle child - protected, assesses where people around her are at - slightly overlooked. It contributes to her silence. Leya means “loyalty and also the Lion”, and Eya means “tribe” in Yoruba, she likes this. It makes sense to her. Her father always said “You become your name”
She listens to Solange Knowles, Erykah Badu, Frank Ocean, FKA Twigs, Afro-house, Afro-funk, a bit of jazz, and local artist friends of hers. She often puts on Soundcloud or playlists and lets them play in the background, not really knowing what she’s listening to. She’s friends with bloggers, and start up owners, small fashion labels, event managers, performers and is always backing them up, supporting them, connecting people to help them out. She’s an avid believer in the growth of community. She hangs out at local poetry nights, and loves to have a good dance with her friends. She goes to yoga once a week and meditates sometimes at home - mostly guided meditations, she journals on and off and writes poetry and songs in her own time.
She’s inspired by people who are into the “wild woman” archetype things, but she doesn’t really know about that world. She likes the look of it from the outside and has a curious calling to see what it’s all about - it kinda feels a bit inauthentic too though. She wonders where the REAL DEAL women doing that work are. She knows a little bit about starsigns, believes that God is a universal energy that we have named, firmly believes in ancestry, but it’s something slightly out of reach. She has an altar in her room, but she doesn’t pay much attention to it. She enjoys existential conversations - she’s more of a listener right now though - her voice is being held back.
She has severe abdominal pain through the month. She hasn’t been able to connect to what it is. It comes and goes. It’s caused by her inability to express herself. She hasn’t grieved her Dad fully and she’s been in some shitty situations with guys. The biggest one is that she was raped at a party when she was 17, she was drunk and didn’t remember much of it. After the event she was mocked about it, it wasn’t taken seriously, she tries to just put it to the back of her mind - she doesn’t want to be called a drama queen or a liar. She lost her virginity when she just turned 16. It was with a boyfriend but she didn’t feel ready at the time. She felt social pressure to not be a virgin anymore.
She’s in a relationship. They get on well and have been together about two years, but it’s not firey or particularly exciting. She really loves him, but she’s not sure what that means. She has trauma holding her back from giving her all and her partner is patient but holding in his own stuff and sometimes just goes quiet on her (this mirrors her own inability to speak up). She gets worried when this happens and disappears into her work to escape from it. Being successful matters to her so it feels like a productive escape - she kinda knows this is unhealthy, but justifies it through making money and being successful.
She’s in her head a lot. Her emotions get the better of her all the time. She needs to connect with her womb space to activate her deep truth and feel the confidence to step into a direction which feels really true to her.
She knows she has this big voice inside of her, she knows that when she’s really aligned she’ll be able to make a MEANINGFUL difference. She’s just unsure as to how to do that - it feels too vulnerable and a bit confusing and she doesn’t quite know where to start. She’s done a few workshops which were good, but she’s wishing that there was something deeper to dive into. She’s intense and likes the whole hog! When she’s in, she’s in BIG TIME.
My story with her:
She sees a video of mine online. It speaks to her and gets her thinking. She sees we have people in common and gets curious (whilst procrastinating). She develops a bit of a girl-crush. I’m saying things she really needs to hear. She goes to check out my website and sees my work, her body activates, she FEELS it’s for her, but gets caught up in her head with excuses - mostly money, so she goes to check out other stuff.
A couple of days later she goes out with friends and my name comes up. One of my videos is referenced and a friend of hers who knows me in person speaks highly of me. Our mutual friend has a lot of love to give, her and I are really close. Thoughts around working with me spark up again. She gets home and drops me a message to say she was with our mutual friend and that they were talking about me.
I connect with her and ask her about her work. I fucking LOVE what she’s got going on. I celebrate her and we get chatting. It unfolds that she really dreams of speaking out. She says she’s interested in hearing more about what I do.
I feel excited by her. I want her in my life. I can feel her power and I want to unleash it and ground her in it. My eyes light up and my body fires into service energy. I sit with that feeling. I appreciate it. It’s affirmation - it’s alignment. I know already she’s coming and there’s a journey ahead for us.
She’s hot! She’s spicy! I GET it, I GET that she has more to offer. I GET that it’s a different direction. I see that she’s not fully speaking up. She promotes her work, not herself and now she wants to be seen. I feel how HUGELY I can help her.
We arrange a call. I jump on and follow the sales script. She buys into my course - pelvic bowl activation women’s work. She’s excited and feels SO ready now. She’s IN!
An hour after the call she drops me a message to tell me that things have started shifting already. Just the commitment to working with me has ignited her energy and activated the transformation already. Her pussy has started pulsating in a way she’s never felt before. I laugh. We both know what’s up ahead.
Our sessions together are BIG. Heavy shit comes up. I hold space for her to move through it all. She feels safe, she feels witnessed, she feels herself transforming. She cries, she breaks down, she feels it, she celebrates it, she thanks it and she allows her stories to move through her. Our sessions are a mixture of moving through clearing work and sharing understandings of the body and tasks she can apply. She’s a whole hog chick - she’s throws herself in.
She messages me between sessions with her wins. She tells me how amazing the integration tasks feel. I celebrate her in her leveling up.
She starts to share her thoughts and opinions more. She decides to start up a blog and she sings on stage and shares a poem at an open mic night. She feels comfortable being heard and seen. She feels alive. People FEEL the transformation in her. She feels sexy and free and fierce and grounded in her decisions and her stance. She has patience because of it, an accepting patience rather than a helplessness. Her partner is blown away by her, she’s alive and he loves it. They start to have more vulnerable conversations, transparency opens, they drop deeper into their love for one another, things feel new. Orgasms become incredible, and he feels called to connect to Nyaniso.
The abdominal pain she had felt eases. She learns to hear and respond to the voice of her body. It serves her and it makes so much sense to her. Her “old self” feels so far away.
We keep in touch. She comes to my workshops in London. My heart explodes as I see her channeling her go-getter energy into herself now. She uses her incredible design work to market herself. She takes commission on design work for other people and starts to run and designers agency of sorts. Her blog reaches 100,000s of readers and she starts to use her networking skills to make things happen. She runs events, she speaks publicly about the importance of owning your voice, she sings and she writes poetry and she publishes a book called SPEAK which talks about the vagina brain connection and the importance of sexual liberation in relation to true authentic expression. It’s one about her journey, a mixture of lessons and stories and poems. She’s wild and she’s free and she’s killing it! She joins Alchemy.
She comments on my posts and she shares my videos. A friend of hers sees and she becomes the mutual friend sitting at a table talking highly of me.
Time goes by and her and her partner feel ready for a journey together. They feel like it’s a parallel Spiral journey. She reaches out to me about making it happen. I speak to Nyaniso and all parties are fired up with YES. Definitely!
Nyaniso and I feel the same full body activations and excitement for what Spiralling these two amazing humans will do for the planet.
Fuck! It. Fucking. All. Just. Happens.
Deeper into the storms, standing strong, wanting it, being clear, holding space, communication, transparency. They feel witnessed, they feel accepted, they confront their shit and we move through it with them. They watch each other unfold, transform in huge ways. They both start to self-clear and become part of our tribe.
Through the Spiral she opens up into wanting to dance more. Wanting to be in her body. She danced when she was young and she’s craving to be creative among other humans. She remembers watching women dance when she was younger. She wants that and wants to reconnect to something ancestral/tribal in her roots. She wants tribe energy. Her partner is a carpenter and painter wanting to do huge high-end set design work.
It makes sense.
In years to come she trains with me to become a clearing-dance performance practitioner and a member of my company. Our work is THROUGH. THE. FUCKING. ROOF and we are forever bursting with gratitude and love and respect for the journey we share. It’s a totally mutual FUCKING MASSIVE love that we feel. We've got each other’s backs and by this point she’s witnessed me through loads of my own shit too. Bossing the world together. (Whilst her now husband is doing incredible set design work for our shows)
We have that sparkle in our eye of knowing. That flirtatious smile upon our face which says “hey gorgeous” - we know how big it all is and we totally own it.